Buddhist Marketer

Spam Comment Downturn Explanation

Nobody from Russia’s been rollin’ through my hood in the past month.

A Different Kind Of Burning Sensation

Nietzsche once wrote, on writing, something to the effect of, “Writing for me is an embarrassing need.  I do not know any other way.”

My friend Lilit, who makes my heart spilleth over in an ersatz big sister kind of way, writes in “brooklyn is burning” {emphasis mine}:

After this, the book won’t be so much mine anymore. It’s off to be edited and printed and illustrated. Of course the words will be mine, and the name on the cover will be mine. But I feel as if I’ve given birth to something that won’t be born until next April. Once the little bundle of mine is sent away, I’ll still get up and look at that empty screen every morning, and the words will come, because they always have, because they don’t know how not to, because I don’t know how to live without them burning out of my fingertips.

It makes me happy to know that good people who craft good things sign good book deals.

I am very proud of you, Ms. Marcus.  I hope that those slender fingertips of yours keep on setting the world on fire.

Free Universal Healthcare. Doctor’s Orders.

Check out my commie pinko friend Cameron on Fox Biz as he drops some knowledge regarding why we need universal healthcare at no cash cost.

I’m actually for this idea, and not just because I currently have no health insurance, but because all of us will have a vested interest in consuming less meat and monitoring the goings-on of industries that want us to be on continuous service subscriptions of expensive pharmaceuticals, the need for which could be drastically reduced by simply approaching health from a holistic, put-down-that-slab-of-red-meat point of view.

Spell Bette_

I ran out of business cards recently and just re-upped.  For my new order, I decided to add my company’s working tagline, “Grow Smarter”.

Unfortunately, seems there was an alignment issue during printing, as the cards simply read

GROW SMARTE|

Oh the multi-level irony!

Rather than toss the whole pack, I’m trying to think of creative ways to use ‘em.  Maybe circle the line that was supposed to be an “R” in a purple ink?  This image is included on the side of the card with the ink mis-fire, so the idea that there’s proofreading and handwriting on the card isn’t entirely apropos nada.

Thoughts?  I’m going to need new cards more quickly than a replacement pack can arrive, so I need to engineer a stopgap that doesn’t involve putting white labels over the mis-fire (egads).

If only I had ordered business cards made of beef jerky, none of this would have happened.

I must admit, the error is pretty friggin’ amusing.  “This is what you get for thinkin’ you’re such a smarty-pants!” sez The Universe.

Good one, Universe.  Ya got me.

Sharing Is Caring

Shout out to my former boss-coach and friend Terrence Thomas, who appeared on Dr. Phil the other day:

Interested in taking an accredited online course in linear algebra?  Okay, it’s not offered (yet) (workin’ on it), but 6,000 other courses are — from aviation (online!  figure that one out…) to Zook’s “Competitive Advantage 101″.

Congrats, Carlton!  Umm, I mean, Terrence.

Is “Add Art” Criminal?

Someone who either failed to think through the consequences of their actions and/or is intentionally a boo-boo head dreamed up a little Firefox plug-in called “Add Art”.  Premise sounds warm-n-fuzzy at first:

• Users add a Firefox plug-in
• When surfing online, ads are replaced with curated art images

Sounds nice, right?  Part of me thinks, “Hey, this is like piping in classical music to high school hallways during passing period!”

And it’s not like Add Art is the first-to-market; there’s an entire world of open source ad blockers out there.  According to the Add Art ‘Background’ page:

Of the 100+ add-ons available for Firefox, “adblockers” are the most popular. The most current, Adblock Plus, has over 18 million downloads (as of May 2008) since Jan 2006 (currently over 250,000/week). It’s predecessor, Adblock, has been downloaded over 8 million times. These extensions work by preventing advertising images from downloading and replacing the ads with blank space. Their popularity has risen as pop-up ads, banner ads, and ads incorporating sound and animation have permeated the internet.

The problem, of course, is right there on their very own home page:

If the people behind Add Art and other ad blockers do not think that they are contributing in what should be a criminal manner to the demise of The New York Times, they’re kidding themselves:

• The New York Times and every other publisher out there makes money from ad sales
• Ad sales only happen when ads convert
• Ads cannot convert if they aren’t clicked
• Ads that don’t load will not be clicked

How is highjacking ad space on a publisher website any different from spraypainting over a billboard, me wonders?

Now, the only way that I would be okay with this is if the advertiser was not charged for the ad impression that was never served and/or these ad blockers could demonstrate that publishers were not negatively impacted.  (I don’t care if the negative impact is small — that isn’t the point.  I’m talking about principles, here.)  Unfortunately, none of the AdBlockPlus FAQs address this point.

If people don’t want to look at ads, then perhaps they should stop enjoying the content that those ads subsidize.

If people want to look at art, maybe they should step away from their computer and go out into the world and patronize a museum.

I give a thumbs up to the intent and understand that the motives aren’t malicious, but for crying out loud.  Do you want to help kill The New York Times?  Then you should definitely install Add Art.

This Is An Opportunity!

I’ve sat on both the client and agency side — once for the same client-agency relationship — and must admit that most clients behave like complete douchebags when given the opportunity.

(Courtesy VeverkaP.)

My rule:  don’t work with douchebags. It’s amazing how having one simple principle makes life so much better!

See also: Don’t Be An Idiot: The Amazingly Simple Way To Win Friends And Influence People

Tawk Amongst Yourselves

Shout out to my friend and former colleague David Schoenberger, founder of a great board game called Family Matters, whereby all players assume a different role in the family and have to work together to solve fake family crises.

Congrats!!

Think Positive!

My colleague overheard a recruiter on a call this morning.  His office is right next to ours.  And I quote:

Well, he didn’t respond to the “Have you ever been convicted of a felony?” question, and it turns out, he was an accessory to a murder. And I’m thinking, as a manager, he sounds like a real team player!

Oh yes he diiiiiid.

Wired Magazine: Mad. At. You.

I am mad at you, Wired Magazine, for your June issue’s cover art, which I noted before spending $130 on magazines and $0 on newspapers:

Mad at you ‘cuz clearly someone’s been rifling through the notes for my company’s website redesign.

Y’all can expect a phone call from my Why You Gotta Be Like That department.