When does thoughtful consideration become coddling?
My older sister posted an article entitled “Disability couldn’t stop Michigan woman’s quest for romance” to Facebook the other day. With it, she included the following comment:
One interesting aspect of the article, the idea that ramps and accommodations are “coddling.” Insight into the dominant cultures perspective.
Naturally I had to read:
Shannon Wiltse … was born without several standard parts …
“You need to know,” Shannon told Allen, [a man who she met online with whom she had been chatting for six weeks and was preparing to meet in person] “that I’m missing everything from the knees down, on both legs, and on my left arm from the elbow down, and on my right hand I have one digit, just one finger.”
The article continued, under the subhead of “No coddling allowed”, as follows:
But the Wiltses never … pitied or pampered her. Their home had no ramps, no easy door handles, not even a stool to help her into bed.
Uh, Beavis?
coddle: to treat with extreme or excessive care or kindness
I don’t think that a modicum of effort to meet the unique needs of your own child is coddling, pitying, or pampering. In fact, I feel that making your kid conform to norms to which she is physically unable is plainly unkind.
Geez, if I had to, like, do a pull-up before getting dinner each night? Or, if my parents had door handles that were too high for me to reach?
Being considerate isn’t pampering or babying. Rather, Shannon Wiltse’s dad comes off as sounding kind of like a bully in the article. Yuckers.
But maybe I’m reading too much into it. ?
